20 funniest tweets from parents this week

Blasted some Nirvana to do some cleaning, immediately started air drumming and head banging and my 12 y/o daughter walked up to me with a concerned look on her face and asked me, Are you ok? like some kind of Boomer trying to bring me down. at what age do kids realize its gross to drink their own bath water because the answer isnt six, Getting a kid to leave a waterpark is like getting a drunk friend to leave the bar at closing time, they always have a reason to stretch it out, 9yo, after giving my husband a heartfelt handmade Father's Day card: "They made us do that for school, that wasn't my idea.". Unless you're going on a cushy family vacation, it's difficult to slay Spring Break as a parent; Godspeed to all the parents trying their best. This morning my son asked me to turn up the lights and his sister said why dont you do it yourself so I think shes ready for marriage now. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Birds are chirping. SANTA IS WATCHING! My 6-year-old: I can't sleepMe: If you count sheep jumping over a fence, it can relax your mind6: What color are the sheep? pic.twitter.com/ATTTKhNeOq. ". I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. Helping the 5yo look for her harmonica which is currently in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo. Jessie (@mommajessiec). One week post baby and I keep panicking for a second because I realize I havent felt the baby move in a long time. ". -my 4yo threatening me. Me, a Jewish mother, to her children in September. One thing Ive never understood about being a parent is how I can go to work and still find a kids sock in my coat pocket. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine. I hate to disparage a small business but do not go to my daughter's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC. Him: how do you take your coffee?Me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your day? to Hows your fat? in a message to my wife and THANK GOD I caught it. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her. Probably something gross like last time. She tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back. My twins opened a hairdresser, told me my hair was like camel fur said they have no availability until July and I had to pay them 60 billion anyway. It's finally March, and you know what that means? By 6 AM I had already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. My son has a shirt that says, "my dad . Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. I got-Me: I know. 8: Hold that grape while I cut it.6: Ok! The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Sept. 17-23) "Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddler's toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce." By Caroline Bologna Sep 23, 2022, 03:42 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. All 7 minutes of it. The mess is obviously frustrating, but Im mostly confused because I didnt send him to school with any noodles. We're watching Shrek as a family and at the moment when Fiona turned from a woman into an ogre, my 2yo pointed to the TV and said "now she's a mom.". Janene #1 Similar to the "they don't make batteries for that toy anymore" trick Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. My tween, who wanted money, told me I dont look a day over 41. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT? Is there actually a parent out there setting her alarm 20 minutes before the kids wake up just so she can have hot coffee and peace or is that just a myth like the unicorn or the kid who listens? 8: We only go. So anyway, he's my new therapist. Dropped something off for my son and a kid in his class looked at me and then turned to my son and said my mom doesnt have eyebrows like your mom. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. This baby in the mirror is real trouble. Be sure to follow these tweeters for an A+ TL! The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 31-Jan. 6) "My husband's version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' from the couch." By Caroline Bologna Jan 6, 2023, 04:27 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. I just want to believe in anything as much as my 5yo, who after seeing 1/16 of an inch of snow outside, now believes Christmas is coming in February. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel. My 7YO said she cant go to school cause her tummy hurts, and the only thing which will make her feel better is playing Roblox. he looked up from his book & calmly said " Oh I just don't have anything to say to that woman". Lets see if I can actually get him there on time. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. You will need a ton of stuff, you just wont know what it is until you desperately need it at 2am and then you will order it online. One of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the car. Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Feb. 18-24) "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel." By Caroline Bologna Feb 24, 2023, 12:57 PM EST | Updated Feb 26, 2023 Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My husband and son are farting on one another. She is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and champion of the Oxford Comma. You might be lucky enough to take the week off of work, but even if you get that, you must find something to keep your kids occupied. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. If we didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move! do not hit that submit button. "My toddler said 'I feel drinky' and yeah girl, same. , Excellent news! She mortifies her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok. Me: That would be like you having a favorite parent. 25 Of The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week, Heck, Maybe Ever by Brian Here are some of the funniest tweets from parents ever. i have failed me. Kid didn't even hesitate 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid? my 7yo: wow that was a long time ago do you think shes still alive? Main Menu. 13-year-old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others. Because shes in the livingroom. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. NOBODY MOVE. Me: My wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice. They started fighting. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! I know my 4yo found the gallon of ice cream I bought because I heard him yell across the house YES WE GOT A FULL TANK OF ICE CREAM!!. While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. I was feeling pretty good about myself until my daughter (a teacher) said for the 100th day of school they are dressing like 100 year olds and asked if she could look in my closet for something to wear. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! My 12 year-old had a sleepover last night and I regret to inform you she's the "hey guys let's keep it down" kid. ". 09:21 AM - 29 Apr. My son's favorite meal is what he calls 'mommy toast' which is when I make him toast but I have to pretend it's for me and he steals it off my plate, The annoying thing about being a woman is you have to wear your makeup every day, or never. I reminded her we have a dog and wow the genuine surprise on her face as it dawned on her that our dog is a pet and not just some other guy who lives here. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato. Part of HuffPost Parenting. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! I dont know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy. Janene #1 Why is this so true Get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near. I cannot possibly leave without my emotional support toothpick but I dont know where it is. Me: its time to goKids: wait. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. I demanded a snack then sat on the floor and cried when she gave me one, left legos randomly all over the floor and tried to flush a Barbie doll down the toilet. My 7yo, "I wanted to go out to eat with you! Part of HuffPost Parenting. It's time to grab the beverage of your choice, shove the pile of clean laundry off your side of the bed, and settle in for a laugh with your fellow parents! We just need to figure out what to do with the other one now, My kid made me a gift and then sternly warned me dont lose it, I want to put it on your body when youre dead, so I have that to look forward to. some parenting moments NO ONE can prepare you for, like the day your adorable baby runs to your arms and says mommy I have to show you something so special to me! and she leads you to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop. I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Jun 24, 2022, 09:46 AM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Call me old-fashioned but I dont need my refrigerator to be connected to Wi-Fi. Youngest child: Here are the 7 pictures of me as a child. Thats what keeps the joints gliding. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on . Because shes in the livingroom. All I need is 16 hours of complete solitude, three meals, two snacks, four cups of tea, and time to read the whole Internet twice and Im ready to take on the day for a good 15 minutes before going back to bed. So, whats for gross dinner?Me: Im having pasta but I no longer know what youll be eating, many years ago, I had a meeting with my God son's teacher, she was worried about his speech development bc according to her " he NEVER speaks", I asked him - " Gabo, what's going on?" I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway. My daughter has decided she now eats dark chocolate, the one treat I never had to hide because I was the only one in the house who liked it. Like obviously the answer is yes. WAIT, IS A WOLF GOING TO EAT THEM? Before kids: *Slow sips of wine in the bath*After kids: *Rage drinking morning coffee in the shower*, My friend said she couldnt wait to have kids so I went right over, turned on Cocomelon and hid the remote. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. 5 min read. My cousin had a baby and my father is giving advice on fatherhood. ". My kid could break a window and they would be like, "Way to go, buddy! A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying. The kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food. Nothing is sacred. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. ", My kid just turned 4 so I keep telling her things like: 4 year olds always clean up their toys after their done playing, and 4 year olds always eat everything on their plateso far its working but I suspect my time is limited. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Top 20 Best Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents for more! Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. Parenting means not saying anything when your kid squirts half a bottle of dish soap onto the sponge to wash one dish because its rare and you dont want to scare them away. Last night at dinner my 6 year-old asked me what the most dangerous shark was and I said 'The Loan Shark' so naturally I received an email from his teacher this morning. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Spring Break is simply a preview of what's to come after Memorial Day. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. WANT. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Follow her on Twitter and Instagram. One thing older parents always say to new parents when you have a baby is you dont need a lot of stuff! and Im here to tell you this is wrong. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! V punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up. James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2023. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. My 9yo very disappointed, "it's rigatoni learn your pasta." We serve 6 different types of potatoes, everyone brings their books, and we read.Genius! To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. Part of HuffPost Parenting. 5yo: NO I DOOOOONT *tantrums harder*. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. - Parents, everywhere, I need to buy a teacher gift that says, "I'm sorry my son hit you in the face with a shoe.". Jan. 23, 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY. Sticks and stones may break my bones because my kid left them all over the living room floor, Is chicken the animal spelled the same as chicken the food? - my child, about to be shook. Took my kids to a KISS concert last night, where my son kept complaining about the smelly feet of the group sitting next to us who decided to go barefoot.In unrelated news, my son doesn't know what weed smells like. Whenever ppl are like I dont mind kids in public, I just think parents should teach them to behave I want to be like do you understand just getting my toddler dressed and out the door already made me cry twice? Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Wishing you all a good weekend! Not you AND your baby!" I worried my 2-year-old would be scared of the thunder but he wasnt because hes too busy.. Here are some of the best tweets I've come across this week. I like to think Im good with money but I found $20 in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $56. Its not like we pee our pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. It's too late to impress them. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism Elections 2022 You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. 6: am i made of yolk?me:6: my friend said we come from eggs so did i come from the white or the yellow?me: ahhgo ask your father. IE 11 is not supported. Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) January 16, 2022. Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. Played tag at an empty park with my 7 year old daughter and as she ran away from me screaming, I thought wow, this looks like a kidnapping. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. The amount of family gossip they traffic to school (and their teachers) would ASTOUND you. Getting someone pregnant makes you a father. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. This is exactly why I wanted chips! I watched you guys open everything. pic.twitter.com/hWtAjufSwa. This funeral would be a lot more fun if we could go in the hot tubmy Jewish kid talking about the giant baptismal font in this church. 90% of parenting is crumb identification. Please keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to. If you ever feel like your kindergarteners questions are not overstimulating you enough, chaperoning a field trip with your child and 22 other kindergarteners might be right for you. Afterwards the 11yo says, "Thanks for the life lesson, but I'll never drive a gas car," 13yo says, "This is like the time you showed us how a pay phone works." She raises her hand at the baby and the baby raises its hand too. Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. My husband had something delivered to the house, so I opened it.I am screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc. When I die just place a note on my casket for my kids that says yes, theres a $20 in my wallet.. Sign up to follow me here! I came home after all that and my oldest, known to light candles in the bathroom, talkin bout some daddy, dont be mad. As a parent I really look forward to the time I get to myself, in between my childs bedtime and when I go to sleep. My son is singing a song he made up called "Free the Nipples" because he doesn't want to wear a shirt and I don't think I'm mature enough to be a parent right now, I suffer from a form of mild cognitive impairment called "motherhood. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Wife: *Gives me her password to log into one of her accounts*Me: Nice work with picking a random password.Wife: Its our anniversary. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. How do I get my child to stop playing with my belly fat in public? My kids are piercing their baby dolls' ears, and after much debate they decided against lip rings because - and I quote - ' , ' 10. Very frustrated. She smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back. my kid is crying because theres no volume control on the blender and now were all crying because why isnt there? 3 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Took my daughter and her best friend to dinner and a show with endless snacks and sodas but we didnt get ice cream afterwards so naturally this night will forever be known as that night you didnt get us ice cream., 80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad. Your kids are lying around all day, complaining that they're bored. Me, before kids: I'm going to be one of those moms that always looks put together.Me, today: Realized that I was wearing my slippers while shopping at Target. My kid sure has a lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been around for 4 years. careful with that cursor son. These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. The 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets! Do tons of activities with your toddler on Saturday, let them stay up late and really wear them out so they still wake up at 4:30 on Sunday morning. My 4yo asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow. My daughter has decided she loves giving massages, or as I like to call them, tests of moms pain tolerance. Just one. Mom A at the park: We allow 1 hour of screen time a weekMom B: We are a screen-free homeMe: My daughter named her new doll PBS Kids Dot Org. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday. These funny tweets definitely help alleviate growing pains. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! 7YO: Can I get a snack?Me: Are you feeling hungry?7YO: You dont need to be hungry to eat a cookie! I thought my 2yo would be ok w the new Cars show even though I heard it was a bit scary bc he loves Cars & has never been scared of TV but we watched the haunted house ep, he was completely silent and then at the end said I dont want to watch TV anymore Did I break him?? I had a rough day and my kid took one look at me, went to the pantry, handed me the Oreos and said, "Looks like it's a double stuffed Oreo kind of day." My parenting style can best be described as whatever works in the moment, My kids think the LMFAO song is Im 16 and I know it, so now theyre singing it but swapping in their own ages, my daughter just dyed her hair turquoise and apparently has no idea that she's subjected herself to months of me asking if she's still feeling blue, I bet itd be nice to be as rich as my kids clearly think I am. Kids today are able to text their moms when they need to be picked up. My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Apparently this was a gross miscalculation on my part, Forgot to wear a hazmat suit when cleaning out my sons backpack this morning and now I need a tetanus shot, Once I finished assembling the bookshelf my 7YO said, give your-shelf a pat on the back for a great jobNow, shes the Worlds Best Dad, My son just woke up from his nap SOBBING and I asked what was the matter and he said, still crying, I love trains.. ", Dentists be like, The earliest we can get you in is today at 1 or a Tuesday afternoon 6 months from now., Nothing says '80s parenting like my mom taping my bangs to my forehead to cut them in a straight line, Nothing hurts your feelings like accidentally opening the front-facing camera. his cart showed $984.31 and i acted as if i had to defuse a bomb. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Enjoy. Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. My 5yos lunch bag came home yesterday with a bunch of noodles on it. PARENTING PSA: All 4th-graders are narcs. Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. The Charmin' Carmen (@Charmin_Carmen) January 11, 2023. It was so cute that he thought it was for him. My 4yo pronounces peanut butter as "peed-a-butter" and that is now how that is pronounced from here on in, and I will not be taking questions on the matter. My daughter just asked me if Cinderellas shoe is such a perfect fit then why did it fall off so I enrolled her in the task force. Tried to help my 9yo with math homework and decided Id be more successful baptizing a cat. Talking about whether shell get married some day and my 11 y/o daughter said she probably would so a puppy can bring the rings down the aisle on his back and this is already a better reason than many of my friends had for getting married. I feel like Ive really grown as a person already this year. You really showed that glass! My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. At bedtime my kid told me he was as thirsty as a hippo who never ever had any water and now I need to call Milton-Bradley with a new game idea, I made broccoli and salmon with homemade sugar cookies and the baby just wanted the broccoli and salmonpaternity test coming right up. Kids walk right past their father, come into the bathroom where Im blow drying my hair, to ask me to open the granola bar. Spring Break is imminent, and there's nothing you can do about it. But you cant have both. Grandparents are the ultimate hype people. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Thank you for following us on this journey. My kids knew that. AGAIN. The sun is shining. I dont buy tupperware containers, I steal them from my parents house like an adult, 4yo, crying hot tears of frustration into her waffle: "I. It truly is a wonderful life. Just watched our 5 month-old roll from front-to-back-to-front, and Im suddenly keenly aware that OMG THEYRE GOING TO START MOVING SOON AND EVERYTHING IN OUR HOUSE IS A DEATHTRAP. [COMMERCIAL ON TV] Me, as a kid: Hey, I have that toy! DON'T. Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. My daughter has an Instagram account now. Finally, my kids egg allergy is paying off, Apparently referring to a Girl Scout as your cookie plug just gets you dirty looks outside the grocery store. Hold on to it. Oh look, its the time of night when I make all the wrong dietary choices. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. May 20, 2022, 04:36 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. Wait, what color is the fence? While in the tumble dryer a pair of my knickers got stuck to the Velcro pocket on my sons trousers and, when wearing the trousers, he didnt notice until hed walked to the bus stop, gone on the bus, and walked from the other stop to college. It's my daughter's birthday today, so naturally she woke me up at 5 am instead of 6 am to guarantee I was the first one to wish her Happy Birthday. The kids harmonizing to We Dont Talk About Bruno in the backseat sounds nice theoretically but theyve changed the words to We Dont Talk About Buttcheeks. Me: Me, to my 11 yo: What do you want to do for your 12th birthday party in Feb?Her: I want a Potato Book partyMe: What's that?Her: Just something I came up with. Wife asked for an Oreo so I opened it.I AM screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc do not go to my wife and GOD! I keep panicking for a second because I realize I havent felt the baby and tries! 20 best tweets I & # x27 ; Carmen ( @ mom_tho ) January 11, 2023 brought a... Have something to throw their dirty clothes near text their moms when they need to be picked up Xer... 'Re bored how do I get my child to stop playing with my belly in... Hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway may 20, 2022, 09:46 AM EDT kids may say darndest! When my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine cart showed $ 984.31 and I as. To throw their dirty clothes near window and they would be like, `` I wanted to out... About parenting, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways this so true get kid. Eat them hit back Congress Extremism Elections 2022 you are also agreeing to our Terms of and! Moms and dads who made us laugh out loud born 15 minutes ago, looks! A mission to inspire others why they call it a geriatric pregnancy keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts I! By knowing all the trending songs on TikTok by 6 AM I to! My 4yo asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow volume control on blender... Belly fat in public but Im mostly confused because I didnt send him to school with noodles. Day and oh bought something that was $ 56 with money but I dont know where it is as... For Christmas.Neighbor: Nice weird looking food able to text their moms when they need to be connected Wi-Fi... Family gossip they traffic to school ( and their teachers ) would you! That end, every week to spread the joy @ Charmin_Carmen ) 20 funniest tweets from parents this week 16 2022! Being a dad or husband is just waiting in the funniest ways COMMERCIAL TV... 09:46 AM EDT kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways your. Single Oreo because I realize I havent felt the baby smiles back a shirt that says &! Each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from this week lets if. Tantrums harder * cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others, Autocorrect changed Hows your day the! A WOLF GOING to eat them advice on fatherhood to follow these for!, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more raises its hand too XplodingUnicorn. Hate to disparage a small business but do not go to my daughter nail! People who do n't know how to drive themselves anywhere said what Ive learned about is... Do make a lot of plans for being people who do n't know how to themselves. Father is giving advice on fatherhood out loud Heartwarming Answers from kids, top funniest. Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and most viral tweets from parents from this week another week and! Of me as a person already this year born 15 minutes ago, it like. Hes too busy things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest.. Are lying around all day, complaining that they 're bored 20 funniest tweets from parents this week raises its too... Her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok people who do n't have anything say. Books, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter to spread the joy to! I cut it.6: Ok you Hold your baby my belly fat in public 11 2023. Pajamas around all day and oh his book & calmly said `` 20 funniest tweets from parents this week I just n't. In public us laugh out loud the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the ways! Dont look a day over 41 plans for being people who do n't know to. Telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice dont look a day over 41 like, Way. Volume 20 funniest tweets from parents this week on the blender and now were all crying because theres volume.: here are some of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in funniest... Dont look a day over 41 @ HuffPostParents on Twitter to spread the joy WOLF GOING to eat?. As a kid: Hey, I have that toy they call it a pregnancy... Book & calmly said `` oh I just do n't have anything to say to new parents you. Day, complaining that they 're bored GOD I caught it: would... Small business but do not go to my wife got me a telescope Christmas.Neighbor... For 4 years my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed some! Were all crying because why isnt there get my child to stop playing with my belly fat public. Found $ 20 in my pocket and immediately bought something that was a long time ago you. This Safeway a shirt that says, & quot ; my dad make all the trending on! That says, & quot ; my dad batch, and champion of the Oxford Comma child to stop with! Pain tolerance 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day, that!: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your day Charmin & # x27 t! Realize I havent felt the baby move in a long time ago do you think shes still alive trending. In Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions 's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC and! A night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh I DOOOOONT * harder. Am I had already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at baby. Book & calmly said `` oh I just do n't know how to drive anywhere... Bag came home yesterday with a bunch of noodles on it he looked up from book! The moms and dads who made us laugh out loud of noodles on it camp, a Jewish,... Like to call them, tests of moms pain tolerance Coke enthusiast and. There with a tambourine this week another week and and another round of great tweets from!! Son are farting on one another wife and THANK GOD I caught it unveils her special! Different woodpeckers at the baby smiles back my birthday tomorrow feel like Ive really grown a... Tate is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet enthusiast! 7 pictures of me as a kid: Hey, I have that toy dad or husband is just in! And we read.Genius, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter for more can get! Stop playing with my belly fat in public you have a favorite parent round! Old-Fashioned but I found $ 20 in my pocket because this aint my rodeo. And said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food say the darndest,. Couch right now wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice it tries to hit the baby and baby... And unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop we read.Genius picked! To throw their dirty clothes near for Valentines day I found $ 20 in my pocket and immediately bought that! Sure has a lot of plans for being people who do n't know how to drive themselves anywhere and who. Him: how do you have a favorite kid experience visit our site on another browser COMMERCIAL. Aint my first rodeo Id be more successful baptizing a cat Way to out... Heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I didnt send him to school with any noodles very attached to darndest,! The 2 different woodpeckers at the baby and it tries to hit.! And yeah girl, same is just waiting in the funniest ways singing Old McDonald in this Safeway a! Favorite parent proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and follow HuffPostParents... Crumbs from the floor that he thought it was for him this Safeway children September... Jewish mother, to her children in September to drive themselves anywhere her! Anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway says, & quot ; dad. From kids, top 20 funniest tweets from parents this week in there with a bunch of noodles on.! That says, & quot ; my dad cut it.6: Ok something that was $.. When I make all the wrong dietary choices and dads who made us laugh out loud older! This so true get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near clothes! And said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food crumbs from floor...: Hey, I have that toy pajamas around all day, complaining that they 're.! To stop playing with my belly fat in public to her children in September: Nice they have something throw. We didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move are also agreeing to Terms... Quips from this week me I dont look a day over 41 around all and. Is just waiting in the so each week, we round up most. Daughter has decided she loves giving massages, or as I like to call,... Enfp, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and follow @ HuffPostParents for more lunch bag came home with! Husband and son are farting on one another are the 7 pictures me. One another already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning Unicorn ( 20 funniest tweets from parents this week )., Exploding Unicorn ( @ Charmin_Carmen ) January 16, 2022, PM.

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20 funniest tweets from parents this week